Grocery Husband

Since we are going to Las Vegas to meet my Mom/Step Dad & Aunt/Uncle for Thanksgiving, my husband suggested that we have a Thanksgiving dinner celebration with the kids this weekend.

Great idea honey!

So he calls me from work at lunch yesterday to go over the menu for our feast. He was oddly excited as we talked about food. Turkeys are on sale. If I buy a turkey and $10.00 worth of food and 2 cases of Pepsi, I get a $15.00 rebate. (He says maybe he'll go back again tomorrow, do the whole deal/rebate/buy/spend thingy and have another rebate sent to my oldest daughters house. Only one rebate per household. You know the drill.)

He volunteered to go to the grocery store on his way home from work to get the goods.

Ok... what gives?? He doesn't like to grocery shop... And... he hates doing anything alone, let alone grocery shop.

Anyway, he calls me on his way home from the store, after he has shopped, to tell me to get the kids ready, unlock the back door and turn on the porch light.

Why?? Have you been drinking??

No, because I have a lot of stuff and I need all your help. Be ready to help in 5 minutes to come outside and give me a hand.

So the kids happily and with much excitement (NOT) got their shoes on and waited by the back door for him to get home.

We all grabbed bags and filled our arms with groceries. Between the 4 of us, we managed to get the food in the house in just two trips!

My husband placed a 19 pound turkey on the kitchen table and made us all "come see"

Come see what? The turkey? In it's plastic wrapper? What are we looking for .... or at? And why do you have that goofy look of satisfaction on your face? It's just a turkey, right? Or is there a winning lottery ticket up it's butt?

No... no lottery ticket, but look how much money I saved on the turkey.

Oh.... I'm sorry.... ok...of course.... good savings honey (children giggling in the background)

My daughter asked "What is all this stuff for anyway?"

We had wanted the dinner to be a surprise, but with enough food to open up a shelter, I had no choice but to reveal the pre-Thanksgiving feast plans.

"Oh great" she says. "Who else is coming over?"

Ummmmmmm...... no one, why?

Mom, we just filled two refrigerators with food. The turkey will take 4 days to thaw. Come on Mom... who else is coming?

Nope.... no one else.... Just go with it honey, your Step Dad is not too familiar with moderation.

And he's way to excited about all the money he saved. I will stroke his genius, money saving ego some more, and I may never have to step foot in a grocery store again.