I am the MOM and I was here FIRST!

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I am a 44 year old mother of three children and grandmother of one. I am divorced from my children's father whom I share joint physical custody of our youngest two children with. I have been married to my fabulous husband for over 9 near-perfect years. I LOVE this man! He is a wonderful generous, affectionate, tolerant and all forgiving husband. He is also a terrific step-dad/male role model to my kids and an even better grand father to our two year old grand daughter. My oldest daughter attends college to obtain her nursing degree. She has been on her own for over three years now (no longer part of a shared custody arrangement like her brother & sister) My middle daughter is in high school and plays on the freshmen volleyball & soccer teams. She's really creative and talented. My son is in middle school and plays hockey and lacrosse. He is a sweet sensitive boy who still says "I love you Mom" frequently. I work part time running an online ebay store. I have terrific and supportive relationships with my family, friends and of course my kids. I am extremely close to my sister, my Mom and my sister-in-laws. They are my best friends.


Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Today I am torn

I am always torn between my two distinct lives every other Wednesday. As my children go to their Dad's tonight, I segue from being a full time Mother this last week to a married couple without kids this upcoming week. Every other Wednesday is simply bittersweet for me.

This week, I will miss my kids not being here. I will miss meals with them. I will miss the sound of their laughter (and even the sound of their bickering). I will miss their week here that is focused on family togetherness, chock full of the things we have come to enjoy as a family, like movie nights, bonfires, trips to the park, baseball games, basketball in the driveway, poker on the back deck with the CD player playing our favorite music or playing a slew of board games.

It's all about my kids when they are with us. We do what they want to do. They know this. And they have grown to cherish this.

This week I will reconnect with my Husband. We have the opportunity to do just what he and I want to do. With such a terrific friendship that is our foundation, we both look forward to whatever exciting adventure we want to embark on during our "childless" weekends like checking into a romantic hotel with a jacuzzi AND a fireplace, going antiquing, (YES, he enjoys that.... I know... "lucky girl"!), meeting friends for dinner and drinks, staying in our sweats all weekend to watch movies and eat carry out, or working on home improvement projects.

It's all about my marriage when my Husband and I are alone. We do what we want to do. We know this. And we have grown to cherish this.

I miss my children when they are not here and yet I enjoy the intimacy and reconnection their absence allows my Husband and I. In our situation, life consists of the perfect balance. We are lucky. (We know this. And we have grown to cherish this).

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